status QUO

"I may not have been sure about what really did interest me, but I was absolutely sure about what didn't." 

- albert camus

Hello Sanjay Patel

And so i've unlocked a couple of entries that have been sitting oh so quietly in my drafts... i told you i'd be back :)

Hinduism

of the many realizations that have occurred to me in the recent past about my heritage, religion has been perhaps the most endearing of them all. growing up in a moderate Hindu home, i had always discredited my mother of her foolish traditions and religious beliefs and practices. she would never defend herself, only smile and let me say the things i would say. she would insist however that i do my part when the time came during a ceremony. as a child, i'd accompany my parents to the temple and never really absorb anything at all... it was more like a trip, an outing for the day.

recently though, i've been longing to be at the temple. i have no idea where this feeling derives from and can't explain to myself, but it's what i feel. i've been more attentive on my visits to the temple and have realized what that place means to my people... or at least what it used to mean. my understanding of Hinduism is that it's not a religion... it's a way of life that is described as a religion to makes things easy for everyone. many of the practices i don't necessarily agree with but i have come to appreciate the value they hold for others. when i see my mother cry in prayer i feel as though she in that moment is experiencing something greater then reality. it's as though she surrenders herself...

I've been gone for such a long while now that i've almost lost that part of me that rejoices in bombarding others with my thoughts. I don't have much of an excuse either, i've been sleeping a lot and trying to put myself together in order for myself to be able to enjoy as much of montreal's summer as i can. thankfully i've got friends that insist i go out and have fun and they've kept me on track more than anything!